letter no. 9

February

This month we had two perfect snow days — enough snow to play in but not completely disrupt our lives. A welcome change from last year, where an ice storm left us four days without power, a house full of dead plants, and stuck at the top of my in-laws’ uphill cul-de-sac. We made cinnamon rolls from scratch (tragically underbaked but still edible!), watched Snowy Day, and played outside. Ari celebrated “Glitter Day” with his preschool class before Valentine’s Day. We mailed our Valentines to cousins and grandparents and practiced our very distinctive signature.

For Glitter Day, I used the Taylor Swift glitter freckles because Ari doesn’t own any sequins!

Also this month, I accidentally showed up a month early to my dentist appointment (burning up half a day of sick leave) and then shattered the back of my phone. I spent that afternoon at Verizon working through whatever scam plan they had going on to replace mine. I have now vowed that this phone will last me five years, no matter what. After agonizing over phone cases (truly the most annoying purchase, the planned obsolescence of it all), I settled on this one.

Watching Trump “drain the swamp” of the National Parks Service and other Land Management Agencies has been gutting. My friend Tania works for the non-profit Outdoor Alliance, and she has a quick form email you can send to your elected representatives to protest these firings. My other easy action step for everyone is to find at least one news outlet you trust and become a paying subscriber. Democracy cannot exist without a free press. Free press cannot exist without paid support. We are New York Times subscribers and also contribute to Oregon Public Broadcasting.

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Reading

Any Person is the Only Self by Elisa Gabbert
I enjoyed this essay collection. I particularly enjoyed the essay “Same River, Different Man” about rereading books. Starting at around fifth grade, I used to read Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret the week (and eventually, the day) before school started. I did that all the way through my second year of college. In my twenties, I read The Member of the Wedding by Carson McCullers four summers in a row. I’m not sure why I quit rereading books, but this essay made me want to revisit a few. I’m also deeply compelled to watch Point Break ASAP.

Big Tents and Best Versions by Rebecca Solnit
“It was a snarky week on social media. Someone I otherwise respect re-posted a guy proposing that all Tesla vehicles should be vandalized (though obviously many people bought them well before this crisis, even before Musk went so far into right-wing rage, racism, and conspiracy theory, and many bought them out of concern for the climate). People lashed out at those who didn't vote for Harris, and apparently some people were sneering at those impacted in a measles outbreak in Texas, though this meant kids suffering the consequences for their parents' anti-vaccination ideology. Going after each other is not going after the Trump Administration; fighting each other produces division when we need unity or at least a broad coalition.”

The God of the Woods by Liz Moore
I am not the most discerning genre reader, but I enjoyed this book. I loved the premise, and I especially liked when the author dove deeper into the characters (Especially Alice and TJ, if you’ve read it).

Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic by Esther Perel (audiobook)
My backlist pick for February — it was published in 2006. Nothing groundbreaking, I think because her ideas have already permeated the culture so deeply. There are a lot of ideas in here that feel very stereotypically gendered, and I think she has to obscure the identity of her patients so much that they become caricatures. I do appreciate the chapters on infidelity and fantasy, as they fall in line with my prior-held beliefs (perhaps circuitously influenced them?).

“I Bought a House. I Got a Neighborhood.” (NYT gift link)
I’ve written about how much I love my neighbors before. I found this short essay quite moving, especially the detail about the lawn. When we first moved into our house, the woman who lives across the neighborhood was chatting me up one day and said, “Don’t worry, when we had young children, we also had the worst lawn on the block.” I died a little bit on the inside, but I didn’t take it personally.

Little Shrew by Akiko Miyashoki
This is like the children’s literature version of the film Perfect Days. Barely anything happens, but it’s perfect. I found it after reading a beautifully written post about kids’ books on My Candle Burns, a blog by the poet and sewist Amy Bornman.

My review of Perfect Days, and by extension, Little Shrew

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Watching

I’m 40. Why do I look young?
I would love to have an excuse to show this to my middle school students. It’s not just about aging, really, it’s about how deceptive faces are onscreen versus real life.

Severance (Apple TV)
Absolutely enthralled by this season!!!

White Lotus (HBO Max)
Absolutely not enthralled by this season!!! I’ve hit my peak of rich people being miserable on vacation, I guess.

Mulholland Drive (Cinema 21)
Amidst the barrage of deeply sincere tributes and memorials, I sheepishly admitted on social media last month that I had never watched a David Lynch movie, nor have I watched Twin Peaks. When a local theater in Portland launched their Lynch retrospective, I jumped at Mulholland Drive tickets for our standing date night. I am surprised Naomi Watts wasn’t nominated for Best Actress — she really made the movie for me. I also found myself wishing that the director character Adam had been played by Freddie Prinz, Jr. Even after just one movie, I can see how deeply influential David Lynch is — I recognized the shot outside the nightclub immediately from the movie Challengers. I am excited to watch more of his work, but I am more interested in watching Sunset Boulevard soon.

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I enjoyed my first no socks day of the season yesterday. I hope hints of spring are hitting where you are, and that you are feeling safe and healthy.

With love,

Lexie